Saturday, June 26, 2010

My Mind Entropy

It's about a month that I haven't got any time to write in here. 6 weeks at work...god it's exhausting
Nima and I stretch ourselves as much as possible to accommodate more things to do, house keeping, cooking, hanging out with friends.
At first I was really stress out. I stayed more than 8 hours many days. I couldn't stop thinking about work even when I was home. I was home but I wasn't. Nima told me once "I want my wife back". He was/is absolutely supportive and he tried to show me how can I separate my mind the moment I step out of my office. Became conscious of myself I start controlling my thoughts.

To begin with I start to say goodbye to office right after 8 hours "Hiva no matter how close you are to finish it after 8 hours out just get out, unless your supervisor ask you to stay or the deadline is tomorrow morning"

"As you stepped out, stop reviewing your day, say goodbye to "Mr amazing B", "Mr A the great", "Ms. N the mother of 4" (I don't know how she does it, she is just amazing), "Mr. P junior", "Mr. H the buddy" and so on. Everybody out this place is closed for the next 16 hours."

"I am turning the radio on, increase the volume and sing with song (I'll do my best). I am coming home yeah, lets think about what can we do today, maybe hanging out with "Hooman the Encyclopedia", have an ice cream a little bit of walk and chat and enjoy the endless knowledge of Hooman in almost everything"

Sometimes "Mr J the serious" from work sneak into my mind "Hiva is it ready yet?" remind me of Bart in Simpson "are we there yet". No no stop right there, I can't let you ruin my day dear, goodbye till the next morning.

These mind struggling sometimes continue even in bed before I go to sleep or right after I wake up early in the morning. I really need to tranquil my mind.  I  don't know when was the last time that I have deep 8 hours of sleep and imagine I don't even have kid or key responsibility at work (I've just started there). I need to reach to that point not to get excited with every tiny miny things happening around me. I'll be there yeah baby I'll be there soon.